Anti-Semitism Explosion Threatens Known Universe

The newly released Annual Antisemitism Worldwide Report for 2023 has revealed a disturbing increase in anti-Semitism across major Western nations compared to the previous year.

The Report is based on a survey in which respondents were asked to endorse four major anti-Semitic tropes. The first trope, “Jews will steal anything that isn’t nailed down,” was endorsed by a horrifying 68% of people surveyed—an increase of seven percent over 2022. “But it’s even worse than that,” explained Jonathan Greenbutt of the Anti-Defecation League. “Using follow-up questions, we discovered that most people who disagreed with the statement did so because they believe that Jews steal nailed-down things too.”

Experts attribute surging anti-Semitic tropes about Jewish kleptomania to heightened awareness of the history of Palestine in the wake of October 7. They cite the Urban Dictionary’s inclusion of the expression “to get Israeled”: ”

When a person tells you that your property is theirs (when it obviously isn’t), and demands you just give this property to them, and if you refuse, they take it by force and the law will somehow be on their (israeling) side.